Emotional Intelligence for People Who Think They Already Have It.

The minute someone brags about their “high EQ,” I get nervous. Because emotional intelligence isn’t a trophy you win. It’s a skill you practice. And most of the people convinced they’ve got it nailed are the ones who weaponize empathy when it suits them and vanish when it doesn’t.

Real emotional intelligence is about awareness and regulation. It’s noticing when your stress is leaking onto everyone else. It’s taking responsibility for how your words land, not just how you meant them. It’s listening without waiting for your turn to talk. Psychology backs this up: research on EQ ties it directly to self-regulation, empathy, and social skills. But all three require humility.

The danger is what psychologists call illusory superiority - the belief that we’re above average at a skill we barely practice. People who think they’re emotionally intelligent often skip the work of feedback, reflection, and repair. They confuse charm with connection.

If you think you’ve mastered EQ, that’s your red flag. The work is never done. The moment you stop learning is the moment you stop being emotionally intelligent.